Authorised Listeners encourage a culture of dignity and respect in ministry and at work. The Revd Hannah Akibo-Betts shares her story of listening.
Reflecting on the person specifications of an Authorised Listener has heightened my appreciation of my time in my mother’s shop, a community hub for her diverse customers and the many “others” she served and walked alongside.
My mother listened with respect without judgement, empathised without attachment, and was resourceful as an enabler rather than a rescuer, empowering and encouraging many.
As a child and adolescent, my mother was also a friend from whom I learnt the intricacies of navigating life’s journeys; in particular, the centrality of God in her life through faith, thanksgiving, forgiveness, prayer, compassion and so much more – skills that are fundamental to my listening role.
The importance of faith in my life is not only based on what I assimilated from my mother, but also on my personal experience of God when early results indicated that I had failed the eleven-plus exam. Broken-hearted but confident I had done enough to pass, my response was to pray ceaselessly. The manifestation of answered prayers came a month later. For me, the change of results confirmed the existence of God, activating my child-like faith and relationship with him.
Challenging times
This position was challenged a few years later when, in spite of much trust and prayers, my mother did not survive her terminal illness. The pain of the loss left me with a sense of confusion and betrayal on God’s part. What I did not know was that my personal discovery of God was only the beginning of a lifetime of learning and discipleship with and through him.
Over the years I have grown a closeness to God that guides me towards him each day and cannot be easily impacted by life’s events. It was this guidance that led me into priesthood and the ministry of listening.
A ministry of listening
The role of an Authorised Listener is not only a privilege but also an opportunity to serve the “other” during their challenging times, offering hope in a Christ-like and neighbourly manner. Our listening is done in the context of trust and knowledge of the Holy Spirit as an enabler working in the situation through our life’s desert experiences: speaking, listening, encouraging, empathising, exploring and praying. At the same time I recognise my own limitations and that of the administrative controls in place. In this context I mindfully and prayerfully suggest and make referrals as appropriate.
Hagar’s experience in Genesis 21:15–20 and my own life lessons remind me that my role is not to rescue but to accompany until sense is made of the other’s situation. For me, an Authorised Listener is an enabler who allows new possibilities and encourages in a pathway of hope.
Words: The Revd Hannah Akibo-Betts, Milton Keynes
Image: Emma Thompson
The Church should foster relationships of the utmost integrity. Get to know our Authorised Listeners: